The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
