I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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