I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Randomize
