My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Randomize
