Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
