we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize