when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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