I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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