have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
