I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
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