I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Randomize
