She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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