she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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