We're like a lot better than the average bears
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize