census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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