I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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