i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize