i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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