Kiss
Puke
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
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