Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
