Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Randomize
