and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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