Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Randomize
