guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
