You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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