She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
