hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
