I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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