walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
