i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
