Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
