Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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