brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
