Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
