i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
