I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize