On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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