dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
