Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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