Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
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