# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
