so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
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