Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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