Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
