i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
