So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
