I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
