Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
