Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry degachick hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(858): View more from California

She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.

Fav 38 5988 1050
share tweet
(740): View more from Ohio

The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.

Fav 18 6867 1155
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(714): View more from California

I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.

Fav 28 1857 6345
share tweet
(228): View more from Mississippi

She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her

Fav 15 3724 1963
share tweet
(847): View more from Illinois

I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him

Fav 12 2106 3428
share tweet
(202): View more from Washington, DC

well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.

Fav 9 2418 1587
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(353): View more from

I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.

Fav 5 1585 700
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(206): View more from Washington

I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.

Fav 0 93 7
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(218): View more from Minnesota

So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.

Fav 0 19 34
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT