hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
