so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
